Darius Kelly would rather have bleached his eyeballs than go to Columbus, Ohio. He was raised outside of Ann Arbor, Michigan, home of the University of Michigan Wolverines th, where the hatred for Columbus and The Ohio State Buckeyes borders on jihad. His entire wardrobe was maize and blue or maize or blue or sun faded, ancient maize and blue.
Darius went by Dick, instead of Darius, and his grandmother’s hatred of his decision to jettison her sainted husband’s first name bordered on holy war too.
She dropped an old curse on him, and he had eaten a buffet of bad luck since.
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Jimmy Doom's Roulette Weal to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.