The new condos north of 49, just easy of Walker Creek, crammed all the deer into that little valley, if you could even call it a valley, over to the other side of Suicide sledding hill and the funeral home billboard.
Everybody was talking about it.
Don’t go fast on Shiawassee, Ed from the IGA hit an eight point.
Don’t drive Shiawassee at night, Monica Watterman totaled her car hittin’ a damn wall trophy.
Don’t drive Shiawassee at all, Big Toad from the VVMC hit a doe on his Harley.
Diane Durham was late for her shift at Scoby’s because she ran off Shiawassee avoiding a buck, and she walked in while everyone was talking about it.
“Everybody better get their limit this year,” she said, deer just took over Shiawassee and I heard it’s bad over on Dentonville too.”
Everybody got kinda quiet then, no one wanted to be rude to Diane, because she poured the stiffest drinks and had the biggest tits, but this was Alcoda County. Everyone over sixteen always got their limit and made extra money showing the downstaters how they could bag theirs, sometimes an extra doe if they had the meat cut in town at Lazbick’s or Lonnie’s Processing.
People hit deer in Alcoda, they did and were always gonna, but it was different to have it concentrated on a two mile stretch of road, with dozens of cars, a bike and a school bus involved.
Lake Sidlow sucked the lemon wedge from his Scoby’s Iced Tea. They were just regular Long Island Iced Teas with root beer instead of Coke, but Scoby had been makin’ them since Lake was a little boy when Lake’s older brother Colt figured out how to order a Scoby’s chili to go, pour the drink into the little sandwich bag the homemade bread slices came in and sell the Iced Teas to the underage kids at a two dollar markup.
Kids would try to drink it straight out of the bag and spill it all over themselves and Colt would laugh and not give ‘em their money back.
Lake Sidlow finished his drink and walked back to the men’s room. He didn’t have to piss that bad, but if he used the restroom he could sneak out the back door without saying goodbye to everyone.
Lake zipped his pants back up, so mad at himself he half wanted to zip his dick to punish himself.
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