33 Comments
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Patris's avatar

Really, really good. She drove those boys batty I’m assuming. One sacrificing for the other... the 33 makes me think that. You’re good, dammit.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

I purposely spared the reader the Mommy Dearest element. The point was simply " listen in the first place and avoid a bigger tragedy down the line."

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Patris's avatar

It came through loud and clear. She was very familiar. When I grew up most moms raised only wounded kids.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Someone could skip out of Fort Knox holding a gold bar above their head before anyone could introduce a new concept into my mom's cranium.

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Patris's avatar

I’m sorry. A different decade or two from yours. I think they tried.

Mine was raised in a kind of hell herself, then read too many ladies magazine. We were science experiments.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

At least I knew I was a mistake after the age of 16 when she admitted she had been lying to me about my biological father. It was a bit of a different dynamic once I processed it. Oddly, two great actors went through similar things, Nicholson and McQueen.

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Patris's avatar

The crucible that forms all creatives I believe.

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Joe's avatar

I finished that story and out loud said "Man!"

That finish describing Alden was spectacular and I was ready for a Twilight Zone episode ender - do do do da.

Just Wow, Jimmy!

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Thanks J/S. You know I love hitting the Wow Meter

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Patris's avatar

Yes

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Jonah Town's avatar

This story is a rollercoaster of emotions, showcasing the intricate dynamics between family members, especially identical twins. Your ability to capture the essence of each character, their struggles, and the complexity of their relationships is commendable. It's a thought-provoking narrative that delves into the depths of human emotions. 👍

Explore captivating Contemporary, Romance, Thriller & Suspense, Science Fiction, Horror, and more stories on my Substack for FREE at https://jonahtown.substack.com

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Thanks for the positive feedback Jonah. I've been doing this for a long time.

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Patty Mallett's avatar

Yep. A definite wow. And what a twist—and how twisted. Geez, Doom. You keep getting stronger.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Thanks Patty. Time to write another one.

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Luke's avatar

Powerful prose, Jimmy. Well done.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Thank you. This one is a new favorite of mine

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Carol Angel's avatar

Mothers, how come they are so good at screwing up their kids? The capacity to love the same child twice just wasn’t in her heart. Screaming perfection as the only way, the boys jealous and hating each other. So sad.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Families are the source of more tragedies than encounters with strangers

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Patty Mallett's avatar

I still really like this one.

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Jimmy Doom's avatar

Thanks. I'm glad they have some legs

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